hey there, just 1 day left i stay at home.
hmm where should i start eh. it's like difficult to start and i just keep staring on the blank page. actually and actually i was thinking what and which way should be taken. i was try harder but the result still make me down. what and where make it wrong?
it is difficult to judge ourself how much harder you work hard, maybe just a little bit of sand in the sea. who's know. sometimes i was thinking that my effort is useless. it is because the result always, always and always severe. and to build up again the venture was so difficult until it build by itself or just leave and forget.
no one know how hard myself to walk in. this is my life, i have plan it properly and the result always failed. not failed actually but not too perfect and broke my heart. yes,man just planned and Allah determined. but i was word hard. O ya Allah forgive me. i should accept this faith. how hard it is. give me strength, Allah. put your nur in my heart, please...
mom and dad i'am sorry if i am not a good daughter for u. too many mistake i had done. too many since children until yesterday and this moment. i always unable to control when i am in anger, when u ask me do something when i don't want to make it. but, in deep my heart actually i really love both of u. although sometimes u don't have enough time with me especially while i am in primary and secondary school. too much wrong mom, dad. i always dispointed both of you.
too much i keep in my heart. better i stop it now. life must go on.
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